I recently found out about the Personal DNA Test and gave it a chance; for my surprise the results were very close to how I am so I kind of recomand you this site.
If you are interested about my Personal DNA Report you can find it here.

I will stop adding new entries to the blog in the form of those before because of a project that’s currently taking up all my time. Instead I will publish some poems from my youth. Hope you’ll enjoy them. This one is called Ravaged by War.

We live in the information age so the speed of every little thing we do is so great that it can be compared at a lower scale to the speed of light. We send information instantaneous to any corner of the world; we can call our friends from Taiwan or Los Angeles just like they were standing in the same city as we. Speed is essential in today’s business as speed means more time to do different other tasks and time as we all know it means money.

It seams though that this speed is entering our lives even when we are not at work. Take Easter for example: a traditional Christian holiday in which the rites should be strictly kept. There are a lot of rituals that follow one another and which culminate with the taking of the light in the altar. Well, it seams that speed if of the essence here as well: because of the fact that, at least in the place where I have spent Easter, a lot of young people attend the ceremony some of the rituals are dropped; thus, the ceremony started with the taking of the light and ended when all the people in the church received it. The reason for this is that the people were in a hurry to get to the local club and party.

I am not saying that I don’t agree with this, but it would be a lot easier if the ceremony was held normally and the people could come and enter at any point without being looked at like stray dogs. I expect some flexibility from the church in these modern days or else I don’t think it will survive for long.

Every time you will see the “!” sign in the title it means that the entry is an announcement and not a normal post. You should read these entries carefully.

I will leave Bucharest tomorrow and will not post to the blog. I will come back on Monday, the 24^th of April and then the posting will resume as usual.

Until then Azrael might post new entries to the blog as she is the new contributor added to the blog. Hope she’ll have a good time with us!

I have recently attended a funeral. An uncle of one of my friends recently passed away and I had to go with her because her mother couldn’t. I attended some funerals before so I had a preconceived idea about what to expect.

Usually at funerals all the people are sad and the family members are usually crying to death (like this could change anything). It is normal I suppose because you lost a dear person and this makes you fell like not wanting to live anymore. Well, this was not the case in this funeral.

Before I start I want to say that the deceased was a strange man; he used to cheat his wife even at the age of almost 70 so I guess he wasn’t actually the most loved member of the clan. When I and my friend arrived there the silence was disturbing. As I have said before I was expecting a lot of crying. My friend told me that the family was making jokes of the dead and the atmosphere was quite cheerful taking in account that this was a funeral. Another thing is that usually the people talk about the dead person, but no, in this case they were talking about anything else, ranging from cats and dogs saved by a family member to politics, head aches and sports. Even when we got in the church very few people were crying (I counted only two).

I want to say that this is the kind of a funeral I’d like to have. It was a nice event and the people were quite tranquil and normal (of course, by the Christian tradition he was going to Heaven). The deceased was also very peaceful and was looking quite good (he wasn’t very blue and actually had a pinkish color).

I mentioned this event to underline the way people can control themselves and even in time of sorrow be normal, unlike other people who faint, yell, cry and make others feel that for those persons the world is over with the dead of the loved one.

I appreciate people who can keep their calm even in stressful situations. This was a tribute to you!

Why do we live? I realized recently that we live just to disappoint us and the ones we love. All the things we do are made in order to ease our own suicide. We search for reasons to take revenge upon ourselves and disappointment is the easiest way. We lie, we pretend to be hurt and by doing this things we make others suffer.

I hate life. The only thing I wish for is death. Unfortunately there is one thing that’s keeping me here, and that thing is a promise; a promise made to a very dear friend, to a friend I appreciate greatly, a friend worthy of the supreme sacrifice. Yes, I would give my life for her at any moment for she is the only thing that makes this life worth living. But the thing is that when life itself starts to mess around and puts traps all around you, things get hard.

Indeed, I am weak. I admit it. I noticed that every time a day starts well and goes on that way, in the evening there must be something to ruin it. It can be anything, from a word heard to a stupid visit to your grandparents even though you hate them. And then you start shaking and shivering, crying and wishing you were dead. That is the point where you break and feel like it’s all over. But no! life lets you rise again and when you feel secure and happy it hits you hard putting you through that crap again and again and again.

And at the end of the day you sit alone staring at the ceiling wondering if it’s worth it; and the answer comes rapidly between tears and sighs. If you have someone to love and that love is embraced and given back then yes, it is worth all the troubles in the world, but if not, I don’t see why a person would continue living.

This is for you my love! Thank you for standing next to me, for holding my hand, for listening to my sighs and for whipping off my tears! Thank you for the sound of your voice, for the warmth of your kiss and for the shivers you make me feel when you’re around me.

Recently a friend of mine told me that I don’t trust her because I hadn’t told her the reasons for which I was depressed.

To get things straightened out I want to point out that I usually don’t tell people the things that trouble me because I don’t want to burden them. This thing usually brings trust into discussion and the usual question is “Why don’t you trust me?”; it’s not that I don’t trust that person, it’s just that I care so much not to get them hurt that I prefer to keep all those bad things for myself.

Now that I’ve got that sorted out I’d like to get to the point of this post. Upon a family reunion held with the occasion of my aunt’s names day I noticed that my family members don’t actually trust each other; I mean, they give the appearance of a normal family which trusts in one another but it isn’t the case. This led me to the conclusion that trust is either a small factor in bounding a family together or that I just belong to a strange group.

I guess that nowadays trust is kind of over-appreciated in social relations. I don’t want to say that I don’t trust my close friends and relatives but trust shouldn’t be so important for interactivity between people. It’s said that without trust nothing can work between two people; I don’t agree with this and point out to the fact that subordinates don’t trust their bosses and vice-versa but this doesn’t stop them to do their jobs and get the work finished on time. The same goes for social interaction; why let someone know a lot of things about you for him to talk to you when you could very easily communicate with that person without knowing his background. It’s like trying to find out what ice-cream a person likes in order to talk about quantum mechanics with him… it’s totally irrelevant. If the discussion doesn’t cover personal issues then why do you need to trust that person? You aren’t giving him important information which could be used in negative ways that might cause you problems.

I honestly tell you that I trust very few people, and only those people know the true me. My physics teacher told us that it’s better for people to know few things about you because once they know everything boredom appears. Of course, this is an exaggeration but the idea stays the same.

The amount of information given to a person shouldn’t depend on how much you trust that person; rather the criteria should be the value of the information given.

This is a tribute to some of my best friends:

The first one in the list is my girl friend Andreea aka Ciupy. She’s the one thing that keeps me going; whenever I feel down she has a kind word and can make me feel sane again. We have the same tastes, we like the same things and we have the same group of twisted friend.
I can always count on her to save me and cheer me up. She is very fun even if she is melancholic at times. I have to thank her for keeping me alive all this time. Yes, in this picture she looks like a criminal but I can say for sure that she isn’t although she is capable of inflicting severe injuries which leave scars for the rest of your life… But yet again, I love her.

Next comes Alex aka Skratch. He’s a strange guy, a very strange guy. He loves to beat people up (judo did that to him) but he really doesn’t do it (all the time). He’s fun to be around and you can count on him to do almost anything. He, like most of my friends enjoys rock music (new and old) and good atmosphere. Also, leave it to him to set up a meeting with all of our friends. He also has a fetish with dogs with curly hair and little girls with dental braces but those are his problems not ours (or maybe the problem is with the world, a world not capable of understanding his genius).

Of course, there are others who shall be mentioned in a future tributary article. They know who they are and by this way I salute them all!

This is the first post…
Normally I should introduce myself but I don’t think I’ll do that just now. In any case, I am a human (I guess) from East Europe; some say that I have some problems while others say that I’m a normal person. Well, that just makes you wonder what some people consider to be normal.

Normality is such a relative concept isn’t it? What normal means to a person might, for another be insane or even plain stupid. So why are people obsessed about it? People tend to integrate to groups, and for them to join they must fit the “normal” criteria of that group. But while some act like sheep in a herd, others tend to swim upstream and hope that they will be left alone.

I am an upstream swimmer. I don’t want to be like anyone else because I consider them to be brainless; yes, I know that this may make me look like a jerk but that’s my opinion. It’s more easy for people to imitate others that to form their own opinion and style of life… this is what I can’t stand and this is the reason for which I have chosen to isolate myself.

Draw your own opinions about myself. They may be right or wrong, but at least it’s your own conclusion and not some one else’s.